GALIMAUFREY
There is another English word, �Galischoentelefoontje� (Gali-schoen-telefontje), which, during the 16th century, was used by virtually everyone in the north-east when they rang to order scones from the local bakery. It is clearly of Dutch origin. (Sadly, as the telephone hadn�t been invented at that time, the word quickly fell into disuse.)
The word is linguistically interesting, because of the initial �G�, similar to that of �Galimaufrey�. Gaelic has a melodious �ch�, as in �loch�. German has a guttural �ch�, as in �doch�.
Yet the most throat-rasping of all is the initial �G� of many Dutch words, for example, �geen�. This is slightly similar in pronunciation to the English word �cane�, and means an emphatic �none!�, or �no!� It is an essential part of every Dutch conversation, but is virtually impossible to say!
To try to pronounce the �G� accurately, imagine that you have a caramel stuck in your throat, 20 cm. below your top shirt button and you perform a gargling noise for about a minute, exhaling vigorously to try to clear it, until it pops out onto the carpet. (This description is almost word-for-word that of the acclaimed Dutch Professor van Hire, in his volume of instruction to Dutch Telephonists, �Phone Ethics�).
Because of the impossibility of pronouncing this essential word, many Dutch citizens emigrate, reducing the size of the population. However, what is worse, the Dutch wedding service includes the words: �Is there any reason why this man and woman should not be married?� The Dutch, a shy people, are unwilling to face the embarrassment of the inability to say �Geen!� ("None!") and the vast majority of weddings are abandoned for legal reasons. No marriage � no children! This is the reason for the tiny population of Holland!
The European Union has made the situation worse by refusing to discuss the problem, preferring to concentrate on regularising the dimensions of a carrot, and introducing Draconian laws on employment. (On a technical point, Draconia isn�t even a member of the EU!) Only recently, I heard of a worker in an orange-juice factory who was sacked because he couldn�t concentrate!
But, let us return to our �Word of the Day�.
Gali � Mauf � Frey = Golly � Mouf (Cockney for �mouth�) � Free.
It can all be summed up in that Cockney rhyme sung to the strains of the London Derri�re (Londonderry Air)
Golly, golly mouf free, Gosh! Gosh! She is free with her mouth!
What a norf and souf, What a mouth! (North and south = Mouth)
She surely has a whopper, She certainly has a big one.
Nobody can stop her. No-one can stop her talking!
GALIMAUFREY = A very talkative girl
Les Douglas (ldthemagicman)
