Hello dear Ivona,

 As u can see, I listened to u when u told me about coloring my posts the suitable way. Why do you think I did it??? Is it that big thing if I colored or not?? Would it harm our site?? No!!

I did it becoz I respect you, love u, and don �t want to annoy you in any way possible. What do u say??

Hugs and kisses to you ( I mean it and it �s all out of love ),

Hi, Ivona! Which one are you in the avatar? The blue scarf or the red scarf? Are you sisters? Makes me think of my sister, who lives on the other side of the Atlantic. I haven �t been with her since 2007, nor with my nephews (one of them just came back from Iraq) my great-nieces, my mother and my in-laws. None of them could make it to my son�s funeral, last year, either. (enough of self- disclosure).

1. About Birthdays and space. I�m used to on-line threads. They are my research area. This community is one of a kind, for several reasons. It has MANY members. Most of them have never met and, most probably, never will. They need 1. To express their subjectivity, such as a) their feelings, using humour, irony, sometimes sarcasm; 2. to connect with others: how? Maintaining sequences, citing one another, referring explicitly or implicitly to other messages, asking questions, asking for others� opinions, challenging others; 3.to vinculate, like welcoming, greeting, using vocatives, icons, pictures, posting birthday wishes. I would love to write a research article on this community, if I were allowed. One of these days, I�ll ask permission: I�m currently working on the protocol (writing the letter to Victor).

As there is no way to bodytalk (did I create a new verb here? Sorry.) Everything must be written, which means more space needed. Should the pictures be smaller and take the normal space, as much as the space needed to show the avatar, the nickname and the flag? Maybe they should: this would imply one more rule to be set and controlled. Would one more rule have a positive impact? Would it be cost effective in terms of the members� reactions to the rule? What�s the affective/social cost of having one more rule?

2. About the same questions being asked over and over. New members usually don�t read the FAQ Section. There is always someone welcoming and helping them out. Everybody needs to be cuddled; the more there is, the more we ask for. How can this solved, then? With another rule that the older members should not respond? Who is ready for a helpdesk? Or ready for a monthly contribution to pay for the service? This community is based on collaboration.

3. About the forum being in a rut I didn�t understand exactly what you are referring to. Most of the issues with this particular forum are a result of the above conditions. If you are referring to its contents, what could the solution be? Assigning people to moderate the forum and come up with teaching issues every single day? (I would be ready to help, I mean� who else would?).I don�t think I understood. Could you clarify? Let�s define the problem to tackle it.

My intention here is to clarify. Or, at least, to put things in perspective and help you out with your anger. This means, since you can�t see me, I�m making an effort - in writing - to show you that I mean well with my post, which made me write another paragraph and hope for not causing an explosion here. Was I successful? How much computer anxiety on both sides - yours and mine - is responsible for it? Unfortunately, there is no Lab to put all this issues to boil and describe the experience. We have to LIVE IT and negotiate meaning. Now, I should add a few icons to replace bodytalk. I just say: you are so lively! When I saw your avatar back yesterday, I thought to myself: here comes the funny one! This is go�n�a�roll!

By the way: my name is Idalina, I�m 57 and I�ve been at the beach the whole day. I hope I�m not too computeranxious!

 Could I, please, ask everybody to be assertive, here? Denise, who�s being bitter here? At least, go back to the thread and find some degrees of bitterness, will you? Where do you stand? Why do you see bitterness where some others just see some anger, and are trying to help, at the very most? Could some of the bitterness you see be only in your eyes? I�ll tell you what I see here: Ivona, the one who is a bit angry, J and LB trying to help, N  trying to cheer up, J saying she sees no solution to the problem.