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ESL forum > Message board > Funny !!!!!    

Funny !!!!!



gilorit
Israel

Funny !!!!!
 
Funny - funny - funny
 
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.
 
As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".
In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.
 
The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
 
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where! more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.
 
Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away. By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".
 
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensi bl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru. Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.
 
If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl.
 
 

20 Nov 2009      





marta v
Serbia

Hilarious and at the same time disastrous!

I seriously doubt this will come into existence, because EVERYONE in this world who speaks and understands English will have to learn it all over again!

It �s not true that spelling causes such a problem for non-native speakers, because I �ve tried out the simplified spelling and reading English texts where every letter in a word is pronounced (reading it as it �s literally written) with my 11 + old pupils, and they found it really funny and confusing!

I �ve enjoyed reading your text! (although it took much more time to read than usual)

20 Nov 2009     



ronit85
Israel

Dear Orit,

I think you could hear me laughing from my city to yours!
I think your text should be taught at school!!!
Have a wonderful weekend
Ronit

20 Nov 2009     



anitarobi
Croatia

HE-HE-HE-HE-HE-HE-HEClap

20 Nov 2009     



sorokaira
Ukraine

Very funny!!!!!!!!!!!LOL

20 Nov 2009     



sorokaira
Ukraine

Very funny!!!!!!!!!!!LOL

20 Nov 2009     



gitasiva
India

LOL It �s going to be chaotic but fun no doubt for the learners. But how about the teachers? We �ll have to attend a workshop and learn phonetics all over again. Big smile 

20 Nov 2009     



alien boy
Japan

zat vas very funy! LOL

20 Nov 2009     



MarionG
Netherlands

I agri wiz alien boy!

20 Nov 2009     



Greek Professor
Greece

Koul.....

Προβολή εικόνας πλήρους μεγέθους

20 Nov 2009     



RabbitWho
Czech Republic

I kinda wish this was true.. except I �d substitute "Th" with a "d" instead. 

20 Nov 2009     

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