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Ask for help > how to correct this?
how to correct this?
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MarionG
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how to correct this?
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Dear collegues,
I have a question; one of my students wrote a crooked/warped/incorrect´messed up sentence and I want to correct it while changing as little as possible. (I want to hang their work so it is important that he 1. can change it within the sentence and 2. it will still be as much as possible his work) It has to be as little invasive as possible..
He wrote: My brother doing music and my sister doing art.
I already wrote a comment (on another slip of paper, not on his page) that he should change it into "My brother makes music" but I �m a bit stuck on the sister. What do you suggest?
I thought of "my sister is into art" or "my sister is an artist" (but since his sister is a mere 17 years old that seems a bit much) What would you use? makes art?
Please share your thoughts... |
14 Oct 2010
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libertybelle
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Hi Marion
It �s called an incorrect sentence - never heard of a crooked sentence!
There are many answers - it all depends on what your student meant.
My brother is interested in music and my sister is interested in art.
My brother is into music and my sister is into art.
My brother wants to be a musician and my sister wants to be an artist.
My brother plays music and my sister paints or draws.
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14 Oct 2010
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sassouki
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I �d simply say:
My brother loves music and my sister enjoys art. |
14 Oct 2010
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libertybelle
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My brother loves music and my sister enjoys art - only works if they are passive interests. I got the impression that the sister and brother play and paint.
Then you�d have to say
My brother enjoys playing music and my sister enjoys doing artwork. ( or painting)
Many people enjoy music and art without being able to play or paint.
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14 Oct 2010
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MarionG
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He was very clear about his brother �making music � , I suggested �plays � music but he disagreed, I think he means his brother not only plays but also writes music. About his sister, I don �t really know what he meant. Here it is very common for high school students to choose a direction in their studies that focusses on the arts ( which can be theory-based or more specific like sculpting, drawing, dance etc.) but I have no idea what his siter does.
�enjoys � or �loves � doesn �t imply that they �do � it themselves. I enjoy music but I can �t play a note... So maybe I will just stick with "is into art" if even a native like liberty belle thinks that is OK?
oh, liberty belle, as you can see I adapted my formulation. With a �crooked � sentence I meant a �warped or twisted � sentence. Of course it is incorrect but it is incorrect in the way that he does use English words with a meaning or usage close to what should be written. The kind of incorrect that allows you to understand what he is trying to say but still full of bad grammar and word choice... |
14 Oct 2010
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MarionG
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Hi Liberty belle, you wrote as I was typing as well...., thanks for your efforts to help! |
14 Oct 2010
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libertybelle
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Composes music - writes his own music? Does that work?
L
ps- -your "crooked" is a new twist - I like it!
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14 Oct 2010
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