The first Rule on the ESLP Forum is:
�You are free to use the Forum to express yourself, ask for help, make suggestions, etc.�
(For those of you who are irritated by Posts of more than a few lines, or who are uninterested in this Post, please, feel free to use the �Scroll� Button, which is on the right side of your screen. You will pass immediately to the next Post. Thank you!)
In Dublin, a motor-cyclist was arrested for contravening a Traffic Rule, and charged with Impersonating a Police Officer.
Apparently, he had been riding his motor-cycle in public, wearing a white crash helmet, on the front of which was written the word P.O�LICE.
After enquiries, the charge was dropped, and the Police released the defendant, Mr. Patrick O� Lice.
A few days ago, I was criticised on ESLP for starting a new topic in reply to a previous post, �Over� or �Around�. It related to a Member�s doubt about the suitability of the Answer given in a Key to a Multiple Choice Question.
I contravened ESLP Forum Rule 3: �Don �t start a new topic when you are replying to a previous post�.
I broke a Rule!
I was wrong!
I apologise!
In my defence:
I thought that I was helping to resolve the doubt of a Member!
I was specifically asked to answer the question, by a second Member!
In giving a full, clear answer, I thought that I was serving the wider community of all the Members!
No doubt someone will ask me why I didn�t answer the query when it first appeared on the Forum.
I am like several other Members of ESLP, who don�t have the luxury of free-time when I want it. I must first devote hours to compulsory chores, before spending a few minutes in-between-times, for �recreation�.
British Universities insist that academic arguments should always be factual, and accompanied by examples and authoritative references. I am convinced, by the numerous messages to me from non-native speakers of English, that detailed explanations are welcomed by them, because many of them do not have ready access to comprehensive dictionaries and grammar books. Many do not understand computer technology.
Adult learners tell me that, as children, they had to learn certain concise English �rules�, and that these rules became fixed in their minds:
�Every sentence ends with a full-stop�; �i before e except after c�; �Every Leap Year can be divided by 4�; �If a noun ends in f or fe, the plural ends in ves�; �If a noun begins with a consonant, we say �a�, if it begins with a vowel, we say �an�, etc.
Every one of these rules is concise! However, because of the Teacher�s desire to avoid a long explanation, every one of these rules is incorrect!
The Student must now unlearn this concise �rule� and learn the correct �rule�, which is more wordy.
On the Forum, there are 10 Rules regarding the behaviour of Members. Unfortunately, most of these Rules have been broken at one-time-or-another.
To take but one example, Rule 9: �If you want to share photos, wishes, funny videos, etc. please use the �Teachers � Cafe�, not the Forum�.
This Rule is broken virtually every day, with photos, animations, announcements of illnesses, catastrophes, deaths, births, marriages, seasonal greetings, etc. Some of them occupy a huge amount of space. Yet, (generally speaking), Members do not complain. Indeed, usually, other Members join in and also break the rule.
Consequently, I was surprised that, whilst attempting to help someone, I was the object of so much detailed criticism, because I had broken a Rule.
I found some of the comments surprising.
One contributor made the perfectly valid comment that the exam question under discussion was ambiguous and that examinees should not be examined on regional varieties of English. The question should not have been used. Broadly speaking, I agree!
Unfortunately, the reality is that the candidate is sitting in the exam room, with the exam question on the desk, badly-worded, waiting to be answered! In a professional examination, the candidate is powerless to change the words and must answer the question, as written.
In my opinion, the candidate would be unwise to answer: �This is a badly-worded question�. In many situations that would be academic suicide. He/she should do the best to answer the question according to the Exam Instructions, (which is what I did), and give a grammatically �correct� answer.
My advice is that the candidate should then ask a senior member of teaching staff to write to the Examining Body, in accordance with the Exam Regulations, explaining the problem with the Exam Paper.
One of the purposes of ESLP is to improve the teaching of English to non-native speakers. As everyone knows, a �Forum� is �a medium where ideas and views on a particular issue can be exchanged�.
Strangely, another contributor complained that English grammar queries should not be answered on the �Forum�, visible to half-a-million Members, but should be answered in a �Private Message�, visible to that one questioner only.
I am trying to visualise a similar scene in a classroom, where a Teacher would give a grammar explanation to one student, but would not want other students to hear the explanation. Why would any Teacher want to do that?
As I read the criticisms of my contribution, I felt that I was being subjected to a complete psychoanalysis.
I am verbose. Then, by implication, I am also probably unfair; annoying; and discourteous.
And then, apparently, I think that I am �allowed to do things that others aren�t�; that I believe that I am more �valuable� than the average Member; and that I regard myself as �better� than the other Members of ESLP.
All of this was deduced from a Post, (attempting to help someone), that didn�t comply with ESLP Rules.
At one point, I began to worry that I might be dragged before the Human Rights Commission of the United Nations. What would my darling Aunt Liz and my dear Uncle Walter in Vancouver, Canada, think of me then, when they realised that I had broken Forum Rule Number 3?
To be on the safe side, I changed into clean vest and underpants!
My only slight consolation was that I hadn�t broken Forum Rule Number 6.
So That Everyone Is Clear
I broke a Rule!
I think that the Rules apply equally to ALL the Members.
I believe that ALL the Members are important.
I regard ALL the Members of ESLP as making a huge contribution to the learning of English, and for that I say: �Thank you!�
Because I have written this Post in a light-hearted manner, you may think that I am unaffected by the replies to my previous Post.
You are completely wrong!
The replies reveal much about attitudes on ESLP.
Les Douglas (ldthemagicman)
. I won�t even use this bossy tone with my pupils 
) and because you are so caring and respectful in your way of answering people who don �t master the English language the way you do , and because you are so clever ... And because I read you as if I was reading a novel!!! Phew! Have I said it all? 
