I wonder if you could help me revise the Abstract from a friend �s Phd thesis. He �s a Gym teacher, as you will notice. I have already made some suggestions. Thank you so much for your help.

 

 

Hi, Elisabete.

Take a look at my suggestion below. The colours used there mean:

- this is something that could be taken away (just disappearing or by being replaced with a better alternative - some of them were your suggestion in your initial post, I agree with all of them):
- this is my suggestion - you could add this here (to make the text clearer and/or to preplace something that was taken away:

- finally, this is the option I consider best (in the situations in which you were not sure which one to choose, and thus presented two possible alternatives). 

 

This dissertation had the purpose of aims at studying the high-performance volleyball coaches� strategic knowledge applied to strategic/tactical match preparation. With an interpretive research paradigma support, we used the semi-structured approach as the method for accessing the five coaches� representations, perspectives and opinions. Our findings confirm the complex, dynamic and ambiguous nature of sports coaching. The coaches use their personal conceptions to interpret wide range circumstances (cultural and organizational) and more restrictive ones (connected to team preparation), to structure relational and decision-making processes with players and staff and to study the opponents in detail, trying to build a desirable competition strength rapport. This happens inside within a temporal framework that establishes the strategic action boundaries, balancing the short time situation management and a projected future vision. The strategy can only be implemented effectively if it receives the support of all stakeholders, developing Effective implementation of the strategy depends on the support of all stakeholders, who are expected to develop cooperative forms that generate commitment, accountability and responsibility, in a self-determined way. This Such relational dynamics highlights the importance of coach developed orchestration negotiating participation, empowerment and decision-making opportunities with the players considering their personality, experience, leadership skills and specific field role. Coaches� interventions shift from deliberate to emergent and impulsive ones, from intuitive-based to tactical ones based on experience and developed in action, thus showing the importance of mixing planned activities and of the ability to perceive, interpret and navigate in complex and dynamic environments. Through the organization and structure, the coach gives the team the background, the foundation to manage the unpredictable, giving meaning and coherence to the collective project.

 
There is just one thing which does not seem very clear to me (but that �s a structural issue, it comes from the original text - I don �t know how close you are to your friend to intervene there) - in the sentence that I underlined, there seems to be a lack of coherence in organisation: shouldn �t intuition-based approaches come first in both parts of the sentence, leaving strategy and planning for the  second part (or the other way around)? The text might be easier to understand if the order was something like: "Coaches � interventions shift from deliberate to emergent and impulsive ones, from tactical interventions based on experience and developed in action  to intuitive ones."

Sandra

Thank you so much for your help. I had the same problem with that sentence. He �s a close friend, so I will just be straightforward. 

 

Thanks once again

 

Elisabete