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Ask for help > WOULD YOU PLEASE HELP ME EDIT THE FOLLOWING PERSONAL STATEMENT OF ONE OF MY STUDENTS, THANK YOU IN ADVANCE.
WOULD YOU PLEASE HELP ME EDIT THE FOLLOWING PERSONAL STATEMENT OF ONE OF MY STUDENTS, THANK YOU IN ADVANCE.
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medamine
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WOULD YOU PLEASE HELP ME EDIT THE FOLLOWING PERSONAL STATEMENT OF ONE OF MY STUDENTS, THANK YOU IN ADVANCE.
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Pretty brownie eye with a mind full of thoughts, a little smile on the cheek that brings the hopes and the vibes everyone needs, a yellow, a happy yellow, a happy lovely yellow that makes our hearts smile, they say life is a combination of magic and pasta and I say he is the combination that everyone is looking for details all I see is details pretty brownie eyes with a mixture of very happy and very deep.. a perfect mixture that I was always trying to figure it all out ... details all I see is details sensitive and faithful, lovable and loyal, dope and kind, I saw this through has brownie eyes. Perfectly painted, I went around, around him, from painting to painting asking each to eat the details I�m looking for and each did ... details all I see is details � Meriem wakes up now � the sounds seem to be similar, � Meriem it time for school wake up � the sounds keeps playing with the notes of my mind and can�t stop from repeating. Wait for school? oh no ... opening my eyes facing the fact that I was about to find a way to express my feeling to my "crush" Anyway I will un pretzel my thoughts later .. �Mommy can I stay at home today I don�t feel well I think I�m sick.. mommy Do I have corona, I think I do, okay then I will stay at home, Safety comes first � � the same scenario again and again, you are doing well daughter, hurry up time for school� fact: my school is far from home. Actually I, oh wait I forgot to introduce myself. It is inextricable for me to unpretzel my brain... Okay, first of all, I am Meriam Maamar, a small girl with pink and glossy cheeks, a small a girl with a big dream, a small girl that shined even after going through plenty of storms, life was challenging her and she chose to fight instead of giving up. In fact, she was a lazy girl she used to hate studying: �studying makes her feel dizzy � does it make sense ? she had passed a national test at the age of twelve but unfortunately she didn�t have the marks that allow her to attend the pioneer secondary school while most of her close friends passed and went to this school ... PATHETIC little girl, the phrase that everyone kept repeating ... Meriem went through a rough time, she had hit lows, she didn�t think she can dig herself out of, but she got it, she had set a goal, she worked day and night non-stop, she saved herself from herself, she enjoyed the ups and downs she learnt from lows, cherished the highs the little girl had passed the exam and had one of the highest marks in her town, she had been chosen among tens of schools to represent their region in the National School her success had cheered her, her success made her heart smile, she fell in love with the justice of the universe and the universe fell in love with her stubborn heart. Meriem went to the pioneer high school and for her, it was the most exciting, exuberant, and challenging experience of her life she was so sociable she made many friends, she organized some parties at her school, she was living her best life, time is running three years have passed and here she is in her last year where she tends to have a high mark to make herself proud again ... Her dream is big, bigger than a blue whale�s, which needs its own parking spot to the she and to the me : remake the world |
24 Jan 2021
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savilla
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Using the word brownie might cause confusion. I think "Pretty brown eyes" would be clearer. - "I say he is the combination that everyone is looking for".
You don�t normally refer to life with a personal pronoun in English. So something like this would be better: "I say this is the combination that everyone is looking for" - pretty brownie eyes with a mixture of very happy and very deep
The words "happy" and "deep" are both adjectives so you can�t talk about a mixture of them. You could say that the eyes are a mixture of "happiness" and "depth". - Okay, first of all, I am Meriam Maamar, a small (...)
I liked this part, but while it starts out with correct punctuation, there are some mistakes with punctuation later on. Mostly lack of capital letters at the start of sentences, and missing commas/full stops. I hope that helps! |
25 Jan 2021
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