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ESL forum > Message board > Linguistic joke    

Linguistic joke





maryse pey�
France

2 friends are speaking.
 
1 has just married his girlfriend.
 
The single asks the married one "What do you miss the most now ?"
 
The married man answers "My morning train"...

28 Jul 2017     



james32
Morocco


One day, a teacher was attempting to teach the names of animals to a class of 5-year-olds. She held up a picture of a deer, and asked one boy, "Billy, what is this animal?" Little Billy looked at the picture with a disheartened look on his face and responded, "I �m sorry Mrs. Smith, I don �t know." The teacher was not one to give up easily, so she then asked Billy, "well, Billy, what does your Mommy call your Daddy?" Little Billy �s face suddenly brightened up, but then a confused look came over his face, as he asked, "Mrs. Smith, is that really a pig?"

30 Jul 2017     



cunliffe
United Kingdom

@james , that reminds me of something! My mam used to sing �Edelweiss � - song from �the Sound of Music � to my dad, but she changed the words to �idle swine. � 

31 Jul 2017     



ldthemagicman
United Kingdom

A Teacher had already taught the names of Parts of the Body to the class, so she was having a revision lesson.
 
"Now, Mary, point to your Heart."
"Here, Miss!" (pointing, correctly)
 
 
"Robert, point to your Lungs."
"Here, Miss!" (pointing, correctly)
 

"William, where is your Liver."
"Here, Miss!" (pointing, correctly)
 
"George, where are your Bowels."
"I don �t know, Miss!"
"What do you mean? You don �t know! We learned last week where your Bowels are!"
 
"Please, Miss, every Sunday night my Mam gives me Syrup of Figs, to move my Bowels!"
(To make me go to the Toilet!)
 
 

31 Jul 2017     



douglas
United States

How do you tell a male hormone from a female hormone?
 
You take off their genes.
 

31 Jul 2017     



spinney
United Kingdom

We �re very sad. The chef in our local Italian restaurant pasta way.

31 Jul 2017     



james32
Morocco

Teacher: What do you call a fish with no eyes?
 
Student: A fsh

7 Aug 2017     

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