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ESL forum >
Ask for help > The elderly
The elderly
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yolprica
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The elderly
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I wonder if in your countries it is happening the same as in Spain, where the elderly were looked after at home by their children except in certain cases and now it is becoming impossible due to the fact the a lot of women work out of the home and people in general are worrying less and less about them. I don �t blame people who think they are better assisted in old people �s homes but something is changing in our society, is the same happening in your country?
Thanks for you contribution in advance
Yolanda |
2 Nov 2010
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Mariethe House
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In France we had and still have oldpeople �s homes but there is a tendancy now to encourage or to respect old people �s wishes to stay in their home ( house or flat) for as long as they can and they are provided with catered meals everyday and most of them have a cleaner or a help who comes round everyday for doing some shopping, cleaning, giving assistance , keeping company for a while and some of it is taken charge of by the social security system. Most old people prefer staying at their place and at the same time it is a good arrangement for everyone as it is cheaper that way!
In some places, old people get together in a block of houses or flats in some sort of community so that they are not so isolated and they help each other for everyday life . They are more autonomous and feel useful at the same time!
families do not take uo their elderlies at home anymore because it is often a problem for everyone: several generations together with different needs, ideas, often lead to conflictual situations!
I understand most old people ,when they get really old (over 90) have to be cared for and that �s when they have to be put in homes! It is a sad situation that not many peole approve of but with modrn busy life there is not much choice when husband and wife are working and children haveto be cared for and when most of the time, families don �t live close to their parents!!
Parents finishing their lives in their children �s homes is very rarely seen nowadays except in the country or among weel l to do families with a lot of money or a very religious background!
Hope it helps! THis is a subject of great concern!
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2 Nov 2010
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Lina Ladybird
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It�s the same in Germany, and I can second everything Marie said above...
However, I know from my Italian husband that this issue is (still) handled quite differently in Italy! He says that - compared to German habits - in Italy a lot more elderly people are allowed to stay at home once they are in need of assistance and support due to their old age and waning ability to care for themselves. |
2 Nov 2010
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lockman
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In MOROCCO an elderly is taken to old peoples homes only when he has no relatives.To take care of parents when they re old is a duty to most of us and is a concept a belief and a conviction deeply rooted in our religion and traditions.It is commonly seen as a felony if not a heresy to take one s parents outside their usual homes.But these days with the growing demands of everyday life some young people tend to forget how their ancestors lived .Fortunately these are exceptional cases.we re all getting old someday and the least our kids can do for us in reward for all the sacrifices we offered is to look after us at that age of weakness and illness don t you think?
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2 Nov 2010
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lockman
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In MOROCCO an elderly is taken to old peoples homes only when he has no relatives.To take care of parents when they re old is a duty to most of us and is a concept a belief and a conviction deeply rooted in our religion and traditions.It is commonly seen as a felony if not a heresy to take one s parents outside their usual homes.But these days with the growing demands of everyday life some young people tend to forget how their ancestors lived .Fortunately these are exceptional cases.we re all getting old someday and the least our kids can do for us in reward for all the sacrices we offered is to look after us at that age of weakness and illness don t you think?
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2 Nov 2010
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lovemykids
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I couldn �t agree more with you lockman. The least thing one could do is to be at their side when they truly need us. |
2 Nov 2010
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tw_karen
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In Taiwan, they will keep their grandparents at home for as long as possible. When they are no longer able to care for their seniors, they will put them in the hospital or in a nursing home.
Their first choice is the home though. There is a thriving business here of having an OFW (overseas foreign worker) that has some care giving experience. They pay them about $600 US a month and tax them 25% of their earnings (I hear). I also hear that many Taiwanese misuse and mistreat their house workers. They must provide a room for them, so they are in the house 24/7 and end up cooking and cleaning and taking care of the children as well as the senior in question.
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2 Nov 2010
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Zora
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I think that this is a "cultural" thing since most old people that I know in Canada value their independence quite fiercely and the idea of living with their children is almost alien to them. My grandmother went to an old folks home, and quite truthfully, to see her you needed to make an appointment because she was never "home"... it was either a trip somewhere with the group, painting classes, volunteer work of some kind, or an event of some sort... she was always busy - and happy!!
Also, both my parents, have stated that when they are too old to look after themselves that they want to be in a home, not a burden on their children...
My mom says, "all animals learn to fly/live and leave the nest, they are not expected to come back when they are old... so we as people should do the same. It �s not fair to burden the young when they are already burdened by life itself..."
But as I say, it �s a cultural thing... and to me, I don �t see anything wrong with homes for the elderly.
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3 Nov 2010
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manonski (f)
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I agree with Zora.
Those are things I discussed with my parents when they updated their will. We have to talk about getting older and sick when our parents and elders are well enough to share their ideas about that. I know I �ve warned my parents to place me somewhere if anything happened to me and I can �t take care of myself anymore. I don �t want to be a burden to anyone. |
3 Nov 2010
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aliciapc
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Yes, Linda, it �s just as you say. When I was in the States a friend told me the same thing about her parents, when they grew old , and I couldn �t understand it ... Now I do, but I don �t agree with it . We were not a burden for our parents when we were babies ... why should they be a burden to us ? Loved ones are not burdens ... are they?
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3 Nov 2010
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